Dear J. C.,
It has been a pleasure to watch you grow over the last 6 years since I met you. Your family is one of my inspirations for my own dream of family, I did not grow up in a safe or loving family, and it is truly exciting to me to see how your parents care for you, enjoy you, teach you, and encourage your growth. Please count yourself as very fortunate, and don’t take that lightly.
This letter will be too advice-y, but I write it like I am writing a letter to myself at a younger age. I wish I had stronger voices of encouragement and direction in my life then, but I was a troubled kid and it took a while for me to find my way. I’m really curious and persistent though, and the life I searched for and created for myself and my family is unique and delightful, and very worth the effort. I alway follow the scent of what interests me, and that is how I found my way out of the fog of pain, doubt and fear.
Learn how to trust yourself. You will be in many, many situations where You are all you have. You are enough, more than enough. Your body is packed with millions of years of genetic evolution that will help you survive and thrive if you listen to the information it tells you. Your feelings and your instincts have lots of information that your mind uses to make decisions. You need to make decisions based on the next right thing for yourself. You don’t know what is coming far down the path. The best decisions are good for you first, and simultaneously for the people you care about. If it is not good for you, it is not good for them either. So don’t let your decisions be swayed by the manipulation of others. Once you’ve get tramadol prescription online made a decision, it is your will that is the muscle of action. Your will demonstrates your integrity. Whether you choose to act in a way that others judge as good or bad, stand by your actions. Act in a way that you can own your choices.
Your self/body is sacred and unique. Though I can attest that one can heal, you cannot replace your self/body with one that doesn’t hurt. The intimate space of your heart and your sexuality is the most precious thing you have. Know your own value. Pain is a learning tool, but do not cause yourself unnecessary suffering. Sample, experiment, and test everything, so you can learn what interests you and what does not, and make the distinction. Plan to care for your body as if you really want it to last in health 100 more years. There are no shortcuts for eating healthily and exercising. Do not be afraid of hard work. Fight for what is worth fighting for. These things your family has already taught you, they are very important.
Though there is much writing that summarizes this better, I will try to be brief: show up, do good work, stand by your words, be kind, be curious, ask good questions. All of those things will keep you strong and able to laugh and cry for all that you will come across on your path. These things I learned from reading, talking with friends, and taking risks to get what I want.
Throw your shoulders back, take a deep breath, and feel your own power. You are a free, young woman with more choices about your life and how you live it than any other generation of women. For millions of years, your predecessors have taken the risks, and taken the hits, to create the opportunities and choices you now have at your fingertips. Think big for yourself.
Your friend if ever you need one,